MODERN MATURITY
by Tom Paxton © 1993

Vocals: Solo by Kathy
with backup by Marcia and The Chorus
12-String Guitar: Eric

When you find it in your mail for the first time, my friends,
Then you know you've turned the corner and you're getting gray.
It's a sure sign of decline; it's the start of the end.
When your wrinkles outnumber your hairs, then it's headed your way.

Chorus:
Modern Maturity means you're getting old.
Now you get the magazine that you hide from your friends.
Once it was the Rolling Stone; it was thrill after thrill.
Now Modern Maturity means over the hill.

When Mick Jagger has his breakfast of yogurt and bran,
Does he read the descriptions by mail of self-rising chairs?
Or you keep on rockin' and rollin' long as you can.
Then you sit in your little seat and you ride up the stairs.

Chorus

I look through its pages, and what I see there
Is that everyone looks about twenty-five with white hair.

You can get polyester pants for $19.95.
You can get your grandchildren's picture on your coffee cup.
If you're tired of walking, there's a scooter that you can drive
Or a button to push if you've fallen and you can't get up.

Chorus